Is it just me, or are there others out there in cyberspace WITHOUT any tattoos? Please make yourself known!
Good Grief.
Here are some of my personal, south of the Bible Belt, favorites:
1. A pair of legs with red high heels–one on the inner arm, one down the body, all leading to some idiot’s hairy armpit…….nice. Can’t you just hear “Sweet Home Alabama” in the background?
2. Picture it: White Guy, both calves, WHITE on one, POWER on the other…as a sidenote, his ASIAN wife walking proudly beside him wearing a strip club tee-shirt and his daughter was a beautiful blend of the 2 morons……there are so many people that want babies, yet these a$%*&!@’s have no problem pro-creating…hmm, because of the irony of the situation, does that make them oxymorons?
3. Looney Tunes……why do people seem to think that Yosemite Sam, the Tasmanian Devil, or Tweety Bird belong on their body forever?
4. Disney Characters……no word of a lie, I JUST saw a 6-8 diameter Holiday Wreath, on yet another calf, with Mickey, Minnie, Donald, & Pluto wishing Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas FOREVER. Maybe it’s a Florida thing.
5. Spiderweb Elbows & Teardrops…..I know that some fool will probably come after me on this one, but SERIOUSLY?!
6. Panthers, with claws, crawling up arms and legs…..ring, ring, clue phone–no one buys this s*&$ for a minute AND it looks like crap.
7. Profanity on your arm or knuckles forever…..I guess the upside is that it is usually spelled correctly.
8. Skulls with vampire teeth and other hellish icons…..perfect for holding your sweet baby in christening photos.
9. Your NAME…..are you honestly so dumb that you need a permanent “Hello, My Name Is” on your BODY?!
10. The tramp stamp…..how many of these uninteresting smears am I going to have to look at–only bettered when accompanied by a whale-tale thong popping out under your muffin top.
I know that there are more fine specimens–feel free to comment and enlighten me.
Maybe I’m in a mood today, but seriously–take a picture and build a scrapbook of memories to keep at home. I don’t care that you’re “Born to be Wild” or that you want snakes coming out of eye sockets in skulls on your arm to be the 1st impression of you. If you need to remember names, keep an address book on you or check your cell phone.
While shows like LA Ink might be fun to watch for the freak factor and, to be honest, the talent of the artists, I find the majority of ink on the everyday individual to be mundane and mainstream–and isn’t that the opposite of what it’s supposed to be?
And don’t even get me started on the pathology of the pain of the needle associated with a “Good Memory”…..
Maybe I’m completely wrong.
Maybe my NOT having any tatt’s means I have commitment issues because I can’t think of one picture I want on my body forever.
Maybe I’m just afraid that today’s Betty Boop will be tomorrow’s Betty Droop.
Maybe I’m the freak here……but maybe I’m not.
I know someone who has a tramp stamp of a freaking gecko! Why? Because she wanted a tattoo and didn’t know what else to get! Indecision is not your friend when choosing an image to permanently stick on your body!
I have no tattoos or piercings in strange places. And I’m proud of it!
People are crazy.
Some people get them to symbolize a very good or very bad experience in their life. They’re not always awful, the problem is what they’ll look like when you’re 88 years old!
P.S. I don’t have any but my daughter has two, two of my sisters have one (each) and I’m pretty sure my youngest son will be getting one at some point!
I prefer my decorations in the form of, say, braclets. But I gotta say there have been times when I thought. ‘Man! It would be so cool if I had a little dolphin on my ankle!’ But then, a couple years later I’m thinking. ‘A little snake wrapped around my wrist would be so hot!’ But then again, Wouldn’t a little spinning TARDIS be awesome? (That’s a Dr. Who reference for all you non-geeks out there.)
The point is, fads are fleeting. Moods shift. Interests wax and wane. Permanance is a bad idea.
The times, they are a-changing.